Todays best Facebook statuses currently being used by my friends (on Facebook that is) are listed below. Do not read them!
(names will remain anonymous)
1.) “more pain in the butt” – (I’d be happy to provide more.)
2.) “is disappointed in his new guitar pickup not being delivered, and the vegan food cart not having what he wants. Top that with Japanese fail attempts. Time for pinball.” – (It’s a sign, you should stop playing guitar and start eating meat.)
3.) “Why is my dog always sneezing?” – (He must be sick of you. Wait, why am I always sneezing?)
4.) “The jerk store called and they’re running out of you.” – (Oh yeah, well your their all time best seller!)
5.) “Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. -unknown”
6.) “I just can’t get into the Beatles” – (GROSS!!)
7.) “I woke up from a strange rain and it was dreaming outside” – (At least you didn’t dream from a strange waking up and it was raining inside.)
8.) “wants to be sincere without being gullible and ironic without being dark.” – (Sounds like you want to be me except not half mexican.)
9.) “wants some ink and not in a pen!” – (I’ll get you an octopus.)
10.) “Woke up from a nap and I feel like I’m inside a jelly mold. Definitely now more tired then when I started…” – (Those naps will wear you out!)
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