“So what should I do Nate?” I ask myself. I try to get my Bengals football fix by paying attention to the Scouting Combine, reading mock drafts, reviewing story lines and various team needs, anticipating free agency, and then enjoying the NFL Draft come late April.

Maybe each NFL franchise could actually have 2 teams, maybe an A-Team and a B-Team, this way the B-Team could play while the A-Team (this is not a group of special forces featuring Mr. T) is having their off-season. Whichever team would win the “Offseason Super Bowl” would get to wear t-shirts sort of like this one:

Would this solve my problem or would I risk burn out? Hmm, this is probably a bad idea.

Or maybe I should start recording all of the games from the previous season and then somehow burn them to DVD if I am not able to save them on DVR, that way I can re-watch all of the best Bengals games from the previous season! Yeah, that’s what I’ll do! But what if the Bengals only win 3 games that season? That would kinda suck, then I wouldn’t be motivated to re-watch those games. Grrrr, yeah bad idea.

What to do, what to do…I mean the juices are flowing but how about some help people?!?!

At least baseball season starts in April and that will help lessen my football cravings for at least a month.

1991 3 – 13
1992 5 – 11
1993 3 – 13
1994 3 – 13
1995 7 – 9
1996 8 – 8
1997 7 – 9
1998 3 – 13
1999 4 – 12
2000 4 – 12
2001 6 – 10
2002 2 – 14
2003 8 – 8
2004 8 – 8

Then I experienced 1 glory year:

2005 11 – 5 (The Bengals won the AFC North, but lost in the AFC Wild-Card playoff game to Pittsburgh, a game in which many (myself included) thought the Bengals would win until quarterback Carson Palmer was injured on the second play of the game.)

Followed by 3 more non-winning seasons:

2006 8 – 8
2007 7 – 9
2008 4 – 11 – 1

So, what should you do if you’re supposed to be part of a team represented by a fierce Indian killer cat but instead others refer to you as group of clumsy inept sports performers? I’ll tell you what you should do! Do exactly what the 2009 Cincinnati Bengals are doing so far this season.

1st – Start off your first game of the season playing like the better team and leading the game against the Denver Broncos with 28 seconds remaining only to lose on a fluke tipped pass that miraculously lands in the hands of a streaking receiver who races in to score a touchdown which results in a heartbreaking 12-7 loss. Same old Bengals! Or so we thought.

Next, you follow that with 4 straight wins, the first being on the road at Green Bay (31-24) and the next three against division opponents at home against Pittsburgh (23-20), at Cleveland (23-20 in overtime), and at Baltimore (17-14). Those wins are HUGE and people start taking notice but many will be waiting for you to turn into the Bungles, me included.

After that show signs of becoming the Bungles by losing a home game against the up and coming Houston Texans 28-17.

Many will think that may be the beginning of a losing streak, but no! Your next plan of action is to demolish the visiting Chicago Bears at home 45-10 by having your quarterback throw 5 touchdown passes and score points on the first seven offensive drives.

Then, after a week off you continue taking care of business by showing you mean business by beating the Baltimore Ravens at home and Pittsburgh Steelers in Pittsburgh for a second time! Remember these two teams were the top 2 teams in the AFC last year and the Steelers are the defending Super Bowl champs. Yep, the Bengals beat the Ravens 17-7 and then out-physicaled the Steelers 18-12.

So now this takes us to the present day, today is November 16th, 2009. The Bengals are 7-2 overall, 5-0 in division games and in first place in the AFC North. I don’t know what will happen during the rest of this season but one thing I feel is safe to say. The Bengals are no longer Bungles!

WHO DEY!

Todays best Facebook statuses currently being used by my friends (on Facebook that is) are listed below.

(names will remain anonymous)

1.) “7 mile run through a farm village in Italy this morning. Life is good. ” – (Sounds great minus the 7 mile run and morning parts.)
2.) “Dear Bears, Do you have any other players you want to cut or trade, please call Mike Brown directly. We LOVE pro-bowl running backs but could use a tight end. Your BFF’s, Cincy” – (This was my status earlier in the day, my name is Nathan Mallon.)
3.) “never smart to put a pic of Miss Piggy on your wifes facebook page…even when she has swine flu”
4.) “is gonna raise the bridge, file down the nut, and take the buzz out the low E…” – (Sounds painful!)
5.) “Our greatest fear as individuals should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter…….”
6.) “It’s my beautiful wife @laurencapozzi’s birthday today. I still can’t believe she’s almost 40!” – (The last 10 years have really flown by.)
7.) “wide awake….i guess that’s good. ” – (I’m kind of narrow awake.)
8.) “Sitting in the sun. Hmmm, lovely.” – (You’re still alive?)
9.) “is Edward Band-aid Hands… So says her husband.” – (That’s why you guys are always holding hands.)
10.) “I’m in Ohio. Yay me! And there’s something comforting in it being as boring and retarded as ever. Annoying…but comforting.”

Become a fan of WhatToDoAbout.com on Facebook right here!

Last year Chad Ochocinco was whining about being traded, Carson had no protection which led to a broken nose in the preseason as well as no timing with his top receivers once the season began due to them not participating in mini-camps. Chad was also hurt for most of training camp and the preseason. Once the season began it got even worse, Carson got hurt in week 3 and ended up missing 12 games, a total of 23 players also ended up on injured reserve throughout the season. All of these unfortunate events contributed to a 08′ record of 4-11-1. My prediction in June of 2008 was that they would finish at 9-7.

We are now at the end of August 2009, the Bengals have completed training camp and played 2 of their 4 preseason games and things are looking much better than last year at this time. In addition to overhauling the offensive line and Carson being back, I think the Bengals had a GREAT draft this past April adding OT Andre Smith (although he is still unsiged at this point), LB Rey Maualuga, DE Michael Johnson and TE Chase Coffman among others, and they also picked up some key free agents in DT Tank Johnson, S Roy Williams, and WR Laveranues Coles to add depth. Chad Ochocinco also seems to be back to his old self and he also seems to be in way better shape than last year. It’s good to see him making plays again.

With all of that being said, below are my more realistic predictions for the upcoming season at this point:

9/13 WEEK 1 DENVER – WIN

9/20 WEEK 2 at Green Bay – LOSS

9/27 WEEK 3 PITTSBURGH – LOSS

10/04 WEEK 4 at Cleveland – WIN

10/11 WEEK 5 at Baltimore – LOSS

10/18 WEEK 6 HOUSTON – LOSS

10/25 WEEK 7 CHICAGO – WIN

11/01 WEEK 8 Bye Week

11/08 WEEK 9 BALTIMORE – WIN

11/15 WEEK 10 at Pittsburgh – LOSS

11/22 WEEK 11 at Oakland – LOSS

11/29 WEEK 12 CLEVELAND – WIN

12/06 WEEK 13 DETROIT – WIN

12/13 WEEK 14 at Minnesota – LOSS

12/20 WEEK 15 at San Diego – LOSS

12/27 WEEK 16 KANSAS CITY – WIN

1/03 WEEK 17 at New York Jets – WIN

*cities in all caps are home games.

There you go, I predict the Bengals finish the 09‚Äô season with an 8-8 record. I think they will improve over last year both offensively and defensively, and if they can avoid injurious at key positions (especially quarterback) or positions that lack depth (cornerback, offensive line) they might be able to win a few more games and maybe sneak into the playoffs. I’ve learned to hope for the best but am used to expecting the worst with this team, here’s to hoping!

1 Sun, Sept. 13 vs. Denver Broncos 1 p.m.
2 Sun, Sept. 20 at Green Bay Packers 1 p.m.
3 Sun, Sept. 27 vs. Pittsburgh Steelers 1 p.m.
4 Sun, Oct. 4 at Cleveland Browns 1 p.m.
5 Sun, Oct. 11 at Baltimore Ravens 1 p.m.
6 Sun, Oct. 18 vs. Houston Texans 1 p.m.
7 Sun, Oct. 25 vs. Chicago Bears 1 p.m.
8 Bye
9 Sun, Nov. 8 vs. Baltimore Ravens 1 p.m.
10 Sun, Nov. 15 at Pittsburgh Steelers 1 p.m.
11 Sun, Nov. 22 at Oakland Raiders 4:15 p.m.
12 Sun, Nov. 29 vs. Cleveland Browns 1 p.m.
13 Sun, Dec. 6 vs. Detroit Lions 1 p.m.
14 Sun, Dec. 13 at Minnesota Vikings 1 p.m.
15 Sun, Dec. 20 at San Diego Chargers 4:05 p.m.
16 Sun, Dec. 27 vs. Kansas City Chiefs 1 p.m.
17 Sun, Jan. 3 at New York Jets 1 p.m.

My main reason for being excited for this upcoming NFL season is because it is a new season. Bengals fans have at least one reason to be excited for a new season and that is because they start out with a record of 0-0. A clean slate. A level playing field. They are undefeated! We can say that for at least four more months.

Other reasons for Bengals fans to be excited include: 1) Carson Palmer is healthy once again, 2) Defense, yes the Bengals defense showed improvement last year (12th ranked in the NFL) and they will get several key players back to full health (Keith Rivers, Johnathan Joseph) and they have added DT Tank Johnson and re-signed S Chris Crocker, all good moves in my opinion. If the offense can get back on track, I think we will surprise a lot of people this year. 3.) IF the Bengals are able to trade Chad “Ocho Cinco” Johnson before or after the draft I will be excited. The guy doesn’t want to be in Cincy and moving him out of town will improve the atmosphere in the locker room. I doubt this will happen though.

Games I am looking forward to:

9/27 vs. Pittsburgh – I hate the Steelers more than any other professional sports franchise, for more on that click here. The Bengals have never beaten Pittsburgh at home since Marvin Lewis has been head coach.

10/25 vs Chicago – The Bears are my second favorite team. I love that they picked up Jay Cutler in the offseason and even though I hope the Bengals come away with the win I always look forward to watching my favorite teams play against each other.

11/15 at Pittsburgh – Another chance to embarrass the hated Super Bowl champs in their house.

12/6 vs Detroit – The Lions were 0-16 last year, I don’t see them being much better this year and hopefully this game is a late season blow out for Cincy.

12/13 at Minnesota – I’m an Adrian Peterson fan, I think he may be the most exciting RB in the league to watch. I look forward to seeing if we can stop him and if we don’t I hope we can squeak by with a win. I doubt it.

The Bengals play back-to-back road games three times during the season and they do not have any prime time games on the schedule this year, which I am glad to see because they don’t deserve it.

That’s all I have to say about that.

1) Kimo Von Oelhoffen. 2005 AFC Wild Card Playoffs. Bengals vs Steelers. On the first offensive play of the Bengals 1st playoff game since 1990, Pittsburgh defensive tackle Kimo Von Oelhoffen accidentally rolled over Bengals quarterback Carson Palmers leg which tore his ACL and MCL ending his season immediately. My heart dropped when this happened. There is no doubt in my mind that if Carson would not have been hurt that the Bengals would have won that game. On the play on which Carson was hurt he completed a 66 yard pass to receiver Chris Henry (which was the longest completion in Bengals post-season history). After the injury the Bengals seemed to lose most of the momentum they had coming in to the game and they lost 31-17. The Steelers chanted in their locker room after the game shouting “Who Dey? We Dey!” Not cool, not cool.

2) Division Rivals. The Steelers are the Bengals division rivals along with the Cleveland Browns and Baltimore Ravens. It is a rule, if you are a die-hard Bengals fan, then you are not a Steelers, Browns, or Ravens fan.

3) Joey Porter. Ex-Steeler’s linebacker Joey Porter and six of his friends basically jumped Bengals offensive tackle Levi Jones in 2007 at a Las Vegas club. A Steeler messing with a Bengal = another reason not to like the Steelers. He could have at least went one-on-one with him.

4) The teams colors are black and yellow. Maybe it is because I already dislike this team, but black and yellow, come on, black and orange are way better.

5) The Steelers are usually good, so that makes me like them less. There is a cocky arrogance to any team when they are successful, so at the moment I dislike the Steelers even more because of this arrogance. When the Bengals are winning and acting this way, I am okay with it.

I could keep going and going with more reasons why the Steelers are my least favorite team, but you get the point. If you happen to have more reasons by why I should hate this team, please do leave a comment below.

Thanks for reading.

Anyway, here are my predictions:

9/07 WEEK 1 at Baltimore – WIN

9/14 WEEK 2 TENNESEE – WIN

9/21 WEEK 3 at New York Giants – LOSS

9/28 WEEK 4 CLEVELAND – WIN

10/05 WEEK 5 at Dallas – LOSS

10/12 WEEK 6 at New York Jets – WIN

10/19 WEEK 7 PITTSBURGH – WIN

10/26 WEEK 8 Bye Week

11/02 WEEK 9 JACKSONVILLE – LOSS

11/09 WEEK 10 at Houston – LOSS

11/16 WEEK 11 PHILADELPHIA – WIN

11/20 WEEK 12 at Pittsburgh – LOSS

11/30 WEEK 13 BALTIMORE – WIN

12/07 WEEK 14 at Indianapolis – LOSS

12/14 WEEK 15 WASHINGTON – WIN

12/21 WEEK 16 at Cleveland – LOSS

12/28 WEEK 17 KANSAS CITY – WIN

*cities in all caps are home games.

There you go, I predict the Bengals finish the 08’ season with a 9-7 record. Will that be enough to get them into the playoffs though? I am not sure that it will at this point since the AFC is a much tougher conference than the NFC with teams like New England, Indianapolis, Jacksonville, San Diego, Cleveland and Pittsburgh who all finished 2007 with 10+ wins. I will try to give my 08’ predictions and pre-season thoughts again before the season starts!

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