Ever had one of those moments when you thought, just for a second, that you were going to die? Did this thought come to you while you were driving? No? Well, mine came while I was in the passenger seat of my sisters car. She was driving with her knee while she was looking in [...]

Have you ever had that friend or family member who just gets all upset about other drivers? Well, I have both a friend and family member that are both very angry drivers. Both will remain nameless as to avoid outright akwardness in my future rides with them. Although we are keeping this anonymous, I am afraid that I will describe them in such a way that they will know who they are…

The friend – drives like someone punched him in the balls for no reason whatsoever. He is always flailing his arms and screaming profanities that are often uncalled for. Not to mention they are down right embarrassing! I am not one that cares too much for what other people think of me, that is of course so long as I am being myself. Yelling at other drivers that are abiding by the laws, but are maybe a little too cautious, is a little bit too much. Which I believe it to be more effort to curse and carry on than to just go around. This effort is something that is practiced so it would not be what comes naturally. It’s a bad habit.

We talk about cars a lot here at the what to do about headquarters, because we like fast cars and faster digestion! I know you were thinking I was going to say women, but alas, you are wrong… again.

Cars are better than women because they don’t talk back, and when you give them gas they don’t slap you! I mean, who’s ever complained about their car and their woman in the same sentence… unless it’s in a country song. I sometimes feel like I could detail my car in half the time that my wife could get herself ready. I mean come on, really? The beauty of a good clean finish on your car, you know that? When it gleams in your eye almost winking at you. That. That my friends is when you know you found something special, something that can only belong between a man and his car.

Now that you have found this lovely piece of machinery you must get it or keep it clean depending on the condition of the vehicle upon purchase. I have comprised a list of instructions for the detailing of your new chariot:

Well, I assume you know enough about me to know that I had a car and then it broke down…? No! Well I suppose you have some reading to do. Done? Good.

My car hunt is over!! I found the car of my dreams! No, really! I have been after this car since 2001. My friend Tim and I used to sit around and talk about having one. After all these years I finally found one, or found one cheap enough, whichever works. I purchased my car this last week and it has been amazing, the whole process was a blessing in itself. It is everything that I thought it would be and so much more. I told my wife it was like seeing a naked woman (her) for the first time, you keep looking again and again to make sure you are seeing what you think you are seeing. She laughed and said that I was crazy, if she only knew…

I started driving my car on my daily rounds about the city, training and bringing pain to select persons. This seemed new and quite exciting as does everything that I do in my new car. One thing that felt really new was spinning donuts in it, this felt new because I have never had a car that would spin a donut on anything other than snow. It was a scene straight out of Motor Trend magazine and it, my friend, was glorious. There is nothing like the smell of fresh burnt rubber after a fresh burnout, it’s so good I am thinking about bottling it as a new scent for men!

Pay attention now. I am going to give you the answer to this WTDA right away. Always give the wave while driving.

Ever been on the highway? I thought so! Well then I am sure you have merged a time or two. There are no laws as to how and when to merge but there are some unsaid rules. The unsaid rules are about to be said, yeah… That’s right, I said it!

Hey there! How are you? Oh, I am sorry to hear that, I hope you get that checked out. Well now, here we are again gearing up for another car article and if you couldn’t already figure it out… I like cars. There I said it, so stop touching my windows, eating in my car, leaning on my car, and please stop parking so close!

Let me give you a little bit of an intro, first thing is, I just moved to Tennessee from Ohio. That being said I had to switch everything over to the new state. This sucked, big time! I would rather ride a bike with no seat, or run down a street wet while people lined the streets with tazers trying to hit me.

It has been brought to my attention that I need to make some updates to the car code article. First you must make sure that you have read and fully understand the rules in the previous article.

Notice that I didn’t say “what to do about parking”. That is because most people park just fine in most cases. Until you get to a tight parking lot… then it’s as if you see their true character right there in between the lines. Or, in some cases, all over the lines. Really, how hard is it?