If there’s a deadline, it will almost always be late. It seems to attract lateness like a moth to the flame. So how do we beat these deadlines? I don’t know your answer, but I will give you my list.

Stamp it. Add said deadline.
Prioritize it. Put it in it’s place.
Double stamp it. Move said deadline.
Do it. Actually look at the task and give it a title.
Triple stamp it. Move deadline back a day.
Finish it. Submit project for spell checking.
Triple stamp a double stamp. You can’t triple stamp a double stamp!
Complete it. Turn in and hope for the best!

I hope this list helps you, I put it to the test at least once a week. If you find yourself not finishing the list, then you may want to write the article “what to do about procrastination”. As I always say, “when in doubt, blog it out!”

Am I able to tell you this because I have now found the perfect fit and ended my quest as a jobseeker? No, and therefore I think I am all the more qualified to tell you to take heart. I mean, so many people might not be able to identify with you at all and others can identify because they have been through it, but the feelings change so fast and looking back feels different than being in the midst of something like looking for work. Also, if you are able to take heart in the midst of your job seekingness (new word) then you are truly making progress in your quest to actually make something of yourself.

Am I getting sidetracked? No, let me carry on. So maybe you have an idea, a great idea, of what you would like to do and are not currently doing it and the path to doing it seems rather overgrown, hidden, and dark… not to mention the path costs money! You need a way to eat! And sleep! And pay for guides! And you need this all as you walk along this overgrown path through the forest (we are still talking about jobs).

So there you are, here we are, back at the beginning, and you are sending in resum√©s, cover letters, and scouring job boards. Not very fun, and seemingly not very effective. What is effective is prayer… and lots of it. Also, talking to people is mucho mucho more effecto. The more people you can talk to the better.

Another thing you can do, that is very effective, is targeting specific jobs and studying them and showing how it can be done better. That is, you can take an interest in specific companies and show them how much you care by putting time and effort into thinking about what they are doing and improving upon it. Then, instead of sitting at home applying for jobs, you can tell them you will work for free for two to four weeks and see how things work out. You get experience (internship for the resumé), and a possible way in with the company, and they get help.

Also, during your job seekingness (new word), make sure you remain disciplined in a schedule. Place strict time limits on all entertainment venues and distractions (limit TV, video games, social networking sites, etc). While you may have a shifted schedule due to meeting with people and job searches, do all that you can to maintain a schedule and/or a task list.

There is much to say when it comes to seeking a new job, it is almost as if whole books could be written on the subject. Regardless, my hope, our hope, is that you take heart little one, buck up buttercup, do not grow faint or weary. You will make it out alive. (Most likely).

I have always said if you think my job is easy you should do it for a day, see how you like swearing, reschedules, no-shows, excuses and useless complaining. I am in charge, so that’s a plus, right? Well kind of… you see, when you are in charge of complainers you get to hear everyones complaints all the time. Besides that, you have to be twice as committed as the person(s) you are working with. Some for you, but lots for them. You got to bring the energy like it hasn’t been brought.

I love it though, after about 3 years of doing the instructing you get real used to the types of people you see come in the door. For instance I can spot these:

- I’m here because it’s cheap
This is just fine with me. Fitness should be accessible, but don’t complain when the class gets cut because of your lack of commitment (attendance) to said cheap class. Hence the reason for raising prices.

- Looks the part boot camper
The person(s) that come in wearing matching clothes with a gatorade bottle and a towel with their initials on it. Cool, but this isn’t a fashion show. Wearing that is just going to get you made fun of. Unless you are actually going to workout — then maybe not. (Strong maybe)

- Gum chewer
Ha! I love this boot camper as this is always a chance for me to establish two things 1) my authority which I don’t need to do with gum but do it anyways. 2) nutritional minute with Terry. This starts with: spit out that gum and then tell me what’s in it. Yes, I do make them spit it into my hand!

Now now, I have had some clients that are incredibly committed and always make me smile. These clients have been great – so great we all came up with these pseudo rules for first timers:

1 ) No gum in boot camp. Ever.
It isn’t real. It didn’t come from a “gum” tree.
2 ) There is no music in boot camp.
Because, there is no music in boot camp.
3 ) There is no asking about music in boot camp.
This rule makes everyone roll their eyes as I say “there is no music in boot camp”.
4 ) No dancing in boot camp.
Unless it’s me doing the dancing, don’t worry it’s free. Call it a bonus.
5 ) No un-sanctioned water breaks.
You’re butt is mine till say it’s not or till the top of the hour. You can drink water at every 1/3
6 ) No sitting
You can rest when you’re dead.
7 ) No talking in boot camp.
This isn’t curves, and I don’t need to know about your great aunts gout.
8 ) No quitting
Nobody likes a quitter. Not even you’re mother.
9 ) If you complain I complain
When I complain it will be about you and your lack of form, determination, proper hydration, loud feet, you’re lateness, you’re matching clothes, gum and why are you stopping!
10 ) Never talk about donuts, diet coke, or your late night indulgences of any kind.
This will actually make me mad, which doesn’t happen to me very often. You are killing the vibe and encouraging the others to make compromises away from my specific instructions.
11 ) You’re welcome.
For the soreness, throwing up, for the sweat, the weight loss, motivation, for taking you’re gum, for making my class affordable and for yelling at you when you’re late.

Besides these you should know the un-spoken rules of working with a trainer. Don’t ever say “I’m actually not sore” or “I wish we could do something for my butt” Oh we will, how about 100 lunges! “I’m actually really good at (enter any workout you would like your instructor to torture yourself and everyone else with)” Then there’s the little known rule, don’t ever say, “I come in a little late to skip jumping jacks” Haha, you just made the whole class mad at you, we WILL do 5 minutes of jumping jacks for no good reason.

Happy resolution season to all and we will see you in the new year if you are lucky!

Terry and I just happened to be walking up Nolensville Road to pick up a twenty foot ladder at a friend’s house. Why were we walking 0.7 miles instead of driving? Well, there was the problem of not having a truck to carry a ladder, and there was also the fact that it was only 0.7 miles.

Nolensville is a fun road, and there are no end to places like Latino Tires:

One of the obvious benefits of walking to pick up the ladder is that it gave Terry and I a chance to talk. We all know what happens when Terry and I have a chance to talk, we get all these crazy ideas. On the walk back, however, we were separated by twenty feet of ladder, and I was yelling back there, “everything all right?!”. I had to keep checking in because it seems my good personal trainer friend was getting a bit winded and I just wanted to make sure that he didn’t need to stop and sit down for a few minutes. I hardly broke a sweat. If I had, I would have made sure it hurt.

Here are a couple recommendations for carrying a ladder down Nolensville Road:
1. I recommend bringing a friend, or a non-friend but willing participant.
2. I recommend, when approaching thugs, to have the ladder act as leverage between you and the thug. This way, you can either use it to shield yourself from any potential blows, or you can throw it down in such a way that it creates an obstacle for the thug as you make a wild dash for safety.
3. I recommend, when crossing the street to have the ladder in front of you, that way if a car is coming you can sacrifice the ladder and allow it to be smashed instead of your body.

In conclusion, I highly recommend carrying a ladder down Nolensville Road. It is an experience that I will cherish and keep in my heart, wherever I go, I will always remember the day I carried a ladder down Nolensville Road. It was such a happy time and the memories are priceless. How can you put a price on such things?

Seriously though, I do find myself working out, doing chores, doing side work, running, and even biking without my shirt. I am not trying to be a show-off, but I just prefer being shirtless. I know most of the time it doesn’t make sense, but sometimes it does. It’s like when Tim and I were doing some side work at a friend’s house and it was 100 degrees outside. I was shirtless before you could say “it’s a scorcher out here”. Tim on the other hand just sweated it right out with his shirt on. Crazy! I asked him why he still had his shirt on, to which he replied, “I am just not a shirtless kind of guy”. What? I didn’t know there was any other type.

Tim’s words inspired thought in my head, “why do I feel a compulsion to be shirtless?” To which I must reply, I grew up this way. I can remember having no shirt and no shoes from May to October for like 9 years of my life. I didn’t burn in the sun and could run a 8 minute mile on gravel! It’s how I was raised, that’s my excuse and I am sticking to it!

Running and biking shirtless is funny to me because if I am competing, I usually have spandex on, and people’s eyes are fun to watch. The either look so hard that you feel naked or they immediately divert their eyes like my shirtless-ness is burning their peepers right out of their head. It’s laughable and entertaining. If I run with a pretty girl in spandex some of the guys are really torn. You can see the internal conflict, “should I look?”, “what if I see the dude with no shirt looking at me?” , “I can’t look”, “but there is a girl, I have to look”, “AHAH! my eyes!”

It’s great.

If you read this and are wondering what you should do, I say, if you got it, flaunt it. If you don’t… Flaunt it anyway. Flex those man titties till the cows come home, or someone asks you to stop. Rock it! Topless! I like my coffee with a nice muffin top! Is that a third nipple or are you just happy to see me? Put that thing away before I lose my lunch in it. Is that a coin slot or a tunnel to china? I don’t want to know just put it away!

Sure it sounds cool, and it has its moments of danger and excitement, but in the end it leaves you strung out with no friends and living a life of constant compromise.

You spend weeks, months, and years studying your target, and most likely your target has been studying you as well. Finally the time arrives when you will come into close proximity, which of course can be extremely dangerous, but also invaluable for gaining invaluable intel.

Once you are in close proximity with the target, you must keep all your wits about you. You must remain vigilant and observant so that no signs are left unnoticed or unheeded. Due to the intense study of the individual, targets of opposite gender often fall in love. Then, when they are no longer in close proximity, the relationship is faced with the brutality of the occupation torn in pieces by the maddening love affair which is made worse by the distance that separates the fated lovers.

How would I know, you ask? I have been there. They say hindsight is 20/20, I wish it were 20/200, that way the past would be blurry. Alas, take my advice, leave the life of espionage, marry the girl/guy and if you must, move to a remote island where no one will find you.

After a lot of practice and plain screwing up some hair I got quite good, but not till after some bad times. I remember shortly after my wife and I were married I cut her hair and colored it auburn. This went terribly wrong and it ended up a bright red. She wasn’t happy, as a matter of fact I think she cried. We soon dyed it jet black which I thought was hot! …But no one else really did, no problem though, we had it colored again by the end of that year.

I have always cut my own hair, which is always so stylish if I do say so myself. Sometime in the early 2000′s I started cutting my best friend’s hair, then it went to his friend, and then his brother, followed by one of the kids that used to work for me and then a mutual friend was getting his hair cut quite often by me. At one point I was cutting hair for about 7 people, this was including my oldest son.

I developed quite the knack for it and the thought crossed my mind about pursuing this as a career. Being a barber was up against personal trainer, obviously the better of the two won out. There is nothing manly about playing with hair all day! That really had nothing to do with it, I just didn’t want to cut hair.

After one weekend of the in-laws at our house, my mother-i-law pulls out a picture of a hair style and says can you do this? I frooooze, what if I say no? Will she still buy me killer Christmas gifts?!?

Aside from just being weird, I didn’t really want to do it so I said “I don’t think I can”. This worked for about a month then she came back to our house and said “how about that haircut?” I gave In and cut it but it was weird and for whatever reason it just creeped me out. So I cut it and she liked it, or so she said, I guess i wont really know till Christmas.

Shortly after, my father-in-law wanted his hair cut… well crap! Now he knows I can cut hair and he wants it done. It’s like cutting the hair of your high school principal. I guess now I know why I wouldn’t like to cut peoples hair that I don’t know that well. It’s just weird, like maybe seeing someone in their underwear or something.

I will still cut hair, but never for a living, it’s too much like real work. I am sure the pay is good, but running your fingers through someone else’s dead cells is just too weird for me.

So the other day I was sitting outside on my lounge chair thinking about food, it was then I remembered that I was doing a new diet and could not have cookies. This realization made me sad but my thoughts carried me to wondering if I could have a cigar and then to a cigar and coffee. I also remembered that I cannot have coffee after a certain time of the day or I would not sleep and this was the certain time.

My thoughts carried me again to wondering how batman moved in that stuffy suit… and why does he sound like he needs a cough drop? It was then that I started thinking about acting, not like I wanted to pursue it, but that it was quite contradictory. I mean really, a serious actor is really still a person pretending to be another person, and that’s really kind of funny.

Serious acting is a concept we all just except, but why? Is it because we crave entertainment? Or because we didn’t want to tell the fellah with the cape in the high school cafeteria he was weird. I think mainly the latter, but what do I know? It’s far easier to be entertained than to change, hence the reason for my blogs. I mean, I could stop writing about my life and just go and make it better by buying my own bath towels, or not slapping my friends senseless but this is not funny. Most of the funny and entertaining stuff is acting right? Except the slapping my friends, that’s just fun.

I remember when I was a kid (16) and my mom would always tell me to straighten up and stop acting up. “But it’s what the people want”, “I am taking what the crowd gives me” I told her. She said I had better stop with the back talk, I was torn. Yes, torn between my two loves:

1) my mother and
2) showbiz

Clearly I have talent… right? I decided not to pursue serious acting, but not for mom but because, who can take acting seriously? I bet you that most actors will do a movie and walk away like “wow, I cannot believe they pay me for this”… and they do, and they are paid very well. Dang mom! I could have been a millionaire, but here I am whining about my life on a blog. Well at least I don’t get recognized for my writings in public, that would get annoying. You know people asking you for your autograph all the time would be crazy.

If you are thinking of pursuing serious acting then you need to remember some things:

1) No whining
2) Stop telling everybody you’re an actor and just act like one
3) If you have a problem with the government just go buy your own country
4) Don’t take yourself to seriously, you are making $4 million a film whether anybody watches or not.

Happy acting!

Annoyance #1 – Disrespectful or rude people (including gangsters). Now I don’t mind it that people may occasionally stare at the guy in the street who is taking photos, I’m sure they are wondering what I am doing in front of their house. I also do not mind when a person kindly asks me what I am doing, why, or who I work for. BUT I absolutely hate being treated disrespectfully. I’ve had people yell and tell me to go home and others follow me in their car and take photos of me. Sometimes you will encounter a gangster or two and need to use your instincts on how to approach the situation. Luckily I’ve never been threatened or had a weapon pointed in my direction up to this point. Usually most people are nice and respectful but there are some bad eggs out there, I like to say eggs because I feel as though I am not always dealing with fully developed individuals.

Annoyance #2 – Dogs that chase you because they are not tied up and are roaming freely in the street or their respective yard. I hate when this happens, I’m riding down the street on my bike heading towards my next intersection and then I hear a bark, “no biggie” I think to myself until I look and see a dog darting at full speed into the street towards me. Why can’t people tie up their yard pets or get the invisible fence? For the love of me and the mail man! I understand if I am shooting on a country road but this usually occurs in residential neighborhoods. You gotta be quick sometimes!

Annoyance #3 – Dogs that bark at you and think they are tough when they are not. These dogs really get under my skin, they are usually small dogs such as a chihuahua or some sort of terrier. They can be cute little dogs, but when they start barking at you in a threatening manner I feel like picking them up and launching them over the nearest rooftop. These are usually the type of dogs to bark non-stop at you and even run toward you but then if you turn around and start walking towards them they run away.

Annoyance #4 – Dogs that have annoying barks and howls…it sounds like your torturin’ a munchkin!

Annoyance #5 – People that hang outside in the street for fun. Tim already addressed this in his article What To Do About Taking Photographs In The Neighborhoods of America. Why do so many people just hang out in the street or in front of their house all day?!?! I mean, why can’t they find something more productive to do with their time? Come on people go find some work to do, read a book, go to the park, go build something or help someone else build something for crying out loud! It’s quite annoying when I ride up to an intersection and have to walk around a group of people in the street doing nothing in order to get my photos done.

“So now you pretty much know what I do. Pretty dang exciting, huh?”

My closing words of wisdom are to stay alert, stay on your toes, use your instincts and hopefully you’ll be a surviving street photographer.