I have a love hate relationship with the early morning. 5 a.m. is the face of morning. The face that gets slapped and then hugged. The face that needs to be washed and then pampered. This is my relationship with the morning, sketchy and confusing. I hate the fact that 5 o’clock comes twice in one day. But I love the fact that I can be up and done with all my work before anyone else even gets up.

Being out and about is nice at that hour, mainly because no one else is out there with me. The streets are quiet and the stop lights are flashing. Somewhere there is a bird chirping as she feeds her young some tasty worm guts. Yeah, morning is alright in my book, but it’s the labor of getting up and getting moving that’s hard. I hate the alarm clock, as a matter of fact I hate everything about it. From the way it looks at me after you set the time for 5 a.m., right down to the way it makes me wake up. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah…. over and over again.

There is nothing I hate more than the alarm clock… well maybe driving a minivan but that’s another (well written) article. I anticipate that stupid alarm so much that it makes me crazy and I cannot sleep. If I do get to sleep it makes me have dreams of waking up late and many people are angry and some of them are even carrying pitchforks and shovels.

Coffee, coffee is what gets me up in the a.m., thick hot coffee. Black and hot is how I like it and my women, it’s true. If you can see through it then it’s not dark enough. If it doesn’t make you want to take the browns to the super bowl then it’s not bold enough. I friggin love coffee, this love is what offsets the alarm clock. It works for me, what works for you? Is it a brisk walk? Is it a slap in the face? Is it the police?

I must know what gets you up early? If you have to get up early that is, if you don’t, you can have the police slap you in the face with some hot black coffee!