It seems that recently I have finally acquired a taste for the spicier side of life. I say finally because ever since I have known my Italian/Mexican friends I have always wanted to experience what they did when they said “it’s the flavor not the spice that I taste”. I initially thought “what does that mean” Now I know!… and knowing is half the battle.
Eating spicy foods is more than the overwhelming heat or sweat that ensues but the very flavor that forces it to happen. It was like I had an epiphany of taste over heat. This happened after my most recent 40 day journey on the makers diet, that I started flirting with the flavors of heat, because there are so many. I was testing the waters with some Frank’s Red Hot sauce I was given, it soon outgrew that bottle and into a full fledge love affair with hot stuff!
Hot food will make a man out of you no matter how girly you are, I felt the heat all the way down to my feet. That would explain why I have more hair on my toes now. Eating more spicy foods is actually a healthy metabolism stimulant, that’s right it will help you lose weight! At risk of sounding like a Personal Trainer I will only go on to tell you that you can have your hot and spicy cake and eat it too!
I was raised to stay away from that hot stuff because it would… give you, uh.. hot sh**! I know why does everything come back to pooh? Well because that is the end of the food chain. If it wasn’t so dang funny I wouldn’t bring it up… Ok yeah I would! So we did, we stayed away from hot stuff, that is until one day…
While working at a silver mine in New Mexico my dad hung around a lot of friends from south of the border, mexicans. Vayamos! Capasoe’ That’s all I got! I should also tell you that while living in the desert I would have a ball hiding from my dad with a Super Soaker water gun and straight up out of nowhere nail him with one glorious gallon of water after a long day at work. I say this because he was never happy about it, as a matter of fact my mom would often hold him back as she was laughing telling him to loosen up. Good times….
It happened that one day I was going through my dads lunch box, as I often did looking for more food… I was a growing boy! Anyway, it was then that I stumbled on a burrito and much to my enjoyment I found, it was not even opened. It was what we call a “big” burrito these days back then all I knew was it was still warm and not eaten and that’s all I cared about. My dad said “go ahead son, you can have it” this is where I must tell you that I am an Ohio boy, which is to say the only thing that is hot was pepper in my house. This burrito wasn’t from Ohio it was from a Mexican fellah with an angry wife, but did my dad tell me this? No!
I bit into that thing like it was Christmas and Santa put a burrito in my stocking, a big ole’ bite! Before I could swallow my mouth full of fire my dad was nearly bent over laughing. This is when I knew something was not right, he said “Fernandos’ wife was mad at him and when she is mad she makes a very hot burrito”. He no longer finished this statement and I was at the sink drinking water then over to the bread then over to the milk in the fridge. After about 15 minutes of pain I had the fire out and my dad was still laughing at me. “I can’t believe you took such a big bite” he said with tears in his eyes.
If that wasn’t enough, the next day I shat fire out of my rear till I cried, no joke that really happened! Now you really know me… suffice it to say that we didn’t eat too much hot stuff after that given the pure delight my dad had in his eyes after getting his water gun revenge on me with a mega hot burrito. But now, now I can eat a hot burrito with the best of them.
Eat your spicy foods kids and don’t shoot your dad with a water gun!